I swear it feels like two years ago... but it was just the beginning of this year when I decided to take a break from photography.
"I can't believe you stopped."
"By now you would have had at least 2,000 followers on instagram."
"You quit everything you start."
My self-talk has been awful not only for my mental health but it has delayed me coming back for as long as it did.
Being the first entrepreneur in my family leaves me answering my own questions paving a path that I would hope that my nieces and nephews feel the urge of doing one day.
"How do I bookkeep?"
"How do I do my taxes?"
"How do I organize?"
"How much should I price this?"
So many tiny specific details go into being a small business owner. Somehow despite it all I learned how to become a sole proprietor, the difference between that and an LLC, getting my first tax ID number as a business, and looking through a database to make sure the name I was doing business as wasn't taken.
DOING - in these cases are the best teachers. So why did I take a break?
I didn't set up boundaries for myself.
When my first video on TikTok went viral I was unaware of the absolute bittersweet NIGHTMARE that comes along with having THOUSANDS of people know who you are, and how to get in contact with me within seconds. My customer service skills were at their highest always going, never stopping, and never living.
"When will my photos be done?"
Messages flooding my phone after every session because my perfectionism was slowing me down which caused the quality of my photos to slowly diminish. It started being more about how fast I could work and less about the art I learned to love.
Photography came into my life in 2018 when I was in a very transformative state of mind. It helped me build myself up from the darkest place I have ever been and here it was 3 years later leading me back to that dark place.
It's taken me 8 months to realize that I didn't go on this break because I don't love photography, but because I never set boundaries for myself. How many sessions am I wanting to book a month, how much value am I putting on my time, and most importantly: how much do I want to grow as a photographer?
I come back this season with one of the many crafts that I love with a goal of becoming a better photographer. I am super excited to show you guys what I have been working on, and hope to work with you in the very near future!